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Writer’s Block Denial

writers-blockSo for about a month, I haven’t really written. Okay…maybe a few pages. But even those felt forced. And don’t they, whoever ‘they’ are, say that you should write every day, whether you want to or not?

Perhaps the reason I couldn’t write was because of all my release things going on. Perhaps it was because my chair felt uncomfortable, I had too many clothes to wash, the moon wasn’t out…I don’t know. Whatever it was, it wasn’t happening when I lit up the ‘Word’ function of my keyboard.

Let’s face it, you can’t force inspiration. It’s either there or it isn’t. Specifically, I’m writing the third and final installment of my Amy series. I marvel that I finished the second one. It’s such a relief to know it’s finished. It even passed the beta reader tests. Two thumbs up, they said.

I know what it is! It’s the pressure to get it right again. Look at “Fifty Shades of Grey.” That girl has got to feel the pressure. Incidentally, I’ve heard not so rave things about the second book. I mean, once you did it amazingly right the first time…    And “Harry Potter”? Didn’t she write the next book unaffiliated with it, under a different pen name? Did she feel the pressure, too?

Not saying that “Waking Amy” is all that. But, I felt strained to do the second one. Albeit, it’s over with and I like it more than the first…but then I have a third one to contrive. I need this one to be the best of all three. End with a bang. Shrimps on the Barbie!, if you know what I mean. Maybe it’s a series thing. I don’t feel this pressure for writing standalones.

Whatever the reason, I identify myself with being a supreme procrastinator. (see previous blog post on this problem) I have to have someone breathing down my neck, a gun pointed to my piggy toe…just to get it moving.

But good news! I wrote an outstanding 7,000 words today. And it wasn’t that difficult. Once I get all the imaginary people in one room, they tend to start talking. Then the buzzer rings, and I have to put the dinner on the table! Oh well, I’ll start again tomorrow. Hopefully, Amy will remember where we left off, and the lines she’s supposed to be saying. 🙂

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Guilty Writing

guiltThis last week has been one of those times that a story has consumed my every waking moment. My sleep…my driving…my working. It has pulled me from the lines of cooking, cleaning, and generally being present in this day. Although it’s wonderful to be visited by a forceful muse—one that pours ideas onto me like a raging waterfall, it has its downside.

As with anything you do independently from home—work or online classes—you run into the guilt factor. At least I do. As a writer, I’m sitting there typing away, doing the side-glance of the dirty dishes, the dirty laundry, and the empty cabinets where food once occupied. I wrestle with character motivation, as well as my own, in terms of getting other things done that need to get done. And I know! I’m at work, right? Writing is my job; one of many. When I do my other job on location, I’m not listening for the dryer to play that most annoying tune, and running to get the clothes before they wrinkle and I have to actually lay a hot iron to them. No, I’m doing whatever that job is. All that’s around me is filing cabinets, desks, computers…or cakes and pies. Pick the job!

Excuse the rant. It’s just that I’m trying to justify the time I’ve put into my latest book and not my daily chores. Even my plants are looking listlessly out to the rain, hoping it will break through the glass and moisten their roots. I kinda wish it would, too. Do you know how many plants I have to water weekly—sometimes twice if I want to see truly glossy foliage? I’ll save my plant addiction for another post!

Anyway, although I am thankful for the plentiful creativity that is pulsing through me now, I am waging the war on guilt. Hopefully it won’t take too long to download my brain onto the computer screen. I’d hate for the kids to come home from school and find my body taken over by the dust bunnies:)