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What we don’t say

Let’s be honest, what we don’t say is probably more important than what we do say. Have you ever sat and thought about all the things you didn’t say in a single day? How strangled the words were, locked deep inside your mind? And why on earth would we strangle our own words? They’re only words after all. Words that we feel. Words that pop into our minds the very second something happens or is said, and we want to unleash them and just feel better for saying it.

Okay, I understand. Sometimes we might not think the most angelic thoughts…is that it? We might find what we are holding back is a tad, okay, very judgmental. Did that person even ask our opinion about what we thought? Probably, probably not. But you’re certainly giving it to them in your head. “That was the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. Your girlfriend is a moron, and you need not spend one extra minute being around her. She might be contagious with her nasty.” Instead we might remain politically correct (ew, I hate that) and say “Maybe she didn’t mean to hurt your feelings when she said the job you have could be done by a fifth grader. Maybe she’s just having a bad day.”

Or we don’t say things in order to not hurt someone’s feelings. “This spaghetti she made tastes like the cardboard box the noodles slid out of.” Still…a good idea to keep the door locked on what we really think. Plus, It’s a bit amusing to do stand-up comedy in our heads sometimes. It can amuse us, especially when we’re gutting down tasteless spaghetti and smiling while it gets clogged down our esophagus.

But then there are the times that these little ol’ four, five, six, maybe seven letter words should be set free. Like when they’ve been bottled up for so long, if you set them underneath a rocket they would shoot it right to the moon. It’s been too long, too suppressed. They’ve made you ill. Poison seeps from the depths of where they remain locked away and slowly begins to kill you. Day after day. Slowly the jet propulsion ability they had become echoes in your mind like a deranged patient, clanging the cup along the cell bars of where they’re locked. “Tell them the truth. Just do it.”

Flip side: The person who does not own a filter. They were born sans any way of never letting you know exactly what is on their mind, what they think, and how you look. These people scare me. They’re a little like a talking mirror. You don’t want to go up to them and ask how those pants make you look. You already know, anyway. They can be rude, outspoken, sometimes hurtful, but when we want to know the truth, they are who we seek out. I can appreciate a filter-less person sometimes. If anything to go and have an honest talk with. No pretenses. No bull. Just a little of like-it-is. Yeah, the world isn’t full of these people. Remember there is a tiny delineation to being honest and just mean. I’ll take the honest and leave the mean.

Sigh.

That was certainly a deep subject. It was just something on my mind. Driving home tonight I pondered the words that keep me company inside my mind. Words that I’d like to share, but don’t. Words that may surprise some, but we’ll never find out. Or won’t we?

Okay, so enough of the knee-deep thoughts. Or were they head-deep? lol Back to what’s going on. It’s been forever, right? Well, I’m still working on my next series. I am so excited about this series. I’ve learned so much with writing my other ones. I’ll share a bit about what’s going on with this new journey….

This is Lucy…Isn’t she a lovely girl? Lady, whatever. Well, love stinks for Lucy. Or so she will soon find out. But on her way to the grand epiphany, she will meet…Martin. He’s a rich (of course) bachelor and the love interest of her good friend. But does he really feel the same way for this friend? I mean, really?

I get chills just thinking of all the twists and turns they are about to go on. And don’t think they’re hooking up. No, no, no. Oh, didn’t I mention? Lucy’s married. And before anyone rolls their eyes and tags my story for a cheater convention, let me stop you now. There is no cheating going on. Well, not with the people who matter. Look at that, I’ve already said more than enough. You’re really going to have to stay tuned to some more tidbits of where my mind wanders. It’s a crazy place, you know.

Stay lovely, friends! It’s Monday, but that’s okay. If we’re lucky, we’ll get to Friday. 🙂

 

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My Why

When you do something, you might sometimes ask yourself why. Why am I eating three more oreo cookies? Especially after I’ve eaten five. Hmm…probably because the milk tastes so good as it’s mushed against the cream. Certainly not because it’s on the food pyramid and you need that extra serving. Or maybe you don’t ask anything, ignore your mother’s voice saying ‘you’ll get fat, then you won’t be eating that junk’. You just open up and plop it in, only to regret it in the morning when the muffin top that was manageable yesterday, just busted like a can of biscuits. Wow, I really rolled down that alley of tangent, didn’t I? And I want some cookies to boot. 🙂 Anyway…..asking why can keep you grounded. Keep you focused. Or maybe take you off the course of something that wasn’t so good. So I ask myself, why do I write? My life is busy. I mean really…I have 6 kids, a job, lots of laundry (did I say lots? I mean I have so much that I will never see any basket bottoms ever). Writing takes so much time. So much effort. So much staring into space and creating. Typing and backspacing because you feel it’s crap. Why put myself through it? I’ll tell you why.

I love it.

I love to tell the story of people living inside my imagination. Seeing their words and thoughts on paper. Walking through the life of a messed up girl or guy and taking rights and lefts (or wrongs) and ending up in a happily ever after. Trust me, happily ever after wasn’t always the case. Now, as I’m aging, who wants to read three hundred pages just to have a semi-trailer truck run them over in the last ten pages? I write because it’s well with my soul. And the cherry on top? Having other people read it and connect with me. Not the haters, of course. We all know they exist. You know, the people who can be sitting on a beach with a gorgeous cocktail and man by their side, waves crushing the sand, sun beaming at just the right temperature, and they’re still not happy. For you, I, along with the free world, cannot make you happy. And I’m okay with that. Pick my stories apart. Whatever makes you feel better. But for the reader who gets it. Who is like me, join my table and feast upon another tale of messy love. For you, I write the stories. For you, I want to chat with. Life is about relationships. When we’re told we have little time left to live, do we say ‘I’m going to really miss my house’? No. We miss people. Pets. Maybe even doing our passion. Things? Never. Writing is very isolating work. It’s so nice to finally release my stories to readers and wait to hear what they got from it.

It’s release day for me, and I’m always anxious to see the reviews. One day I hope to reach a platform where I get more feedback. That’s a lovely goal. Until then, I’ll keep writing. Because I love it.

Have a lovely weekend, everyone. I’m off to visit the Carolinas with my husband. It’s a pretty big birthday for him and we have a generous babysitter. I can’t wait!!

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Release Day!!

I’m so excited to send this latest baby into the reader realm! It would be absolutely amazing if everyone welcomed Colin and Claire into their imaginations and loved them as much as I do. 🙂 I know it’s a stretch…but a writer can hope!

Have you ever had a crush on someone and knew it couldn’t happen? Claire has finally fallen head over heels for the guy she grew up with every summer at the Cove. There’s just one problem…he comes from money, and she lives in a one bedroom apartment in Queens. Colin’s dad would never stand to see his son get involved in any girl who wasn’t born into privilege. And so the story begins…

I’m always a bit nervous to read reviews. As with most people, I question my ability with each one I read. Realizing everyone has different tastes for books like they do certain foods, I cannot focus on the good, bad, or ugly. LOL  I write from my heart…my very messy heart!

Happy Release day, everyone! I hope you enjoy it and please let me know either way in a review on Amazon or Goodreads. It really helps readers find me and lets me know what you think.

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Time for a New Release!

NYE-1936It’s that time again! Book 2 of my Sarah series is hitting the internet waves. I couldn’t be more happy. All the readers who searched for the next page (at the end of the book 1) is finally vindicated. This one takes place five years later and Sarah is finally reaching some normalcy in her life. Time to take time for herself. After all her daughter is getting older, having more play dates than Sarah, and beginning to worry about her mother’s happiness. And just like that! Guys begin coming out of the woodwork…guys that make no sense, guys she shouldn’t have feelings for, and Sam!     I hope everyone who continues Sarah’s journey, likes it!

I’ve been doubling down on wearing my whites this week….it being Labor day very soon, and all. But isn’t that rule sort of changing? I’ve seen white being worn after September. What are they thinking?! 🙂

For those following my adoption journey, it’s going well. Slow and full of paperwork, but well. One thing for sure, everyone in my family has had a physical! I can’t tell you the last time I had a hearing test. Elementary school? And child proof locks? Yeah, after years of not worrying about that, we’ve got ’em. I’ve caught my hand on them a couple hundred times so far. I feel like Homer Simpson everyone time I pull on it and it catches. “Doh!”

My kids are back in school. I don’t love the early mornings, but I love the fact they’re being productive. How many hours can one play Minecraft and not get a paralyzed tush?

Well I’m off to piddle. I’ve got so much to do, but sometimes when you’ve got too much on your plate, all you can do is piddle in it all. If I piddle enough, maybe I’ll achieve something big!

Have a great one! And thanks for your support. 🙂

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This right here

Add a few more plates, and that’s how I feel! Why yes, I did just get back from vacation. But now I need a vacation to get over the vacation. I feel like since May I’ve been going at warp speed. And it’s only picking up. I’ll recap since I’ve been too lazy to put finger to keypad and keep everyone involved minute by minute.

Boy comes home from college. Hmmm… haven’t had him in awhile. Dynamics change a bit. “Oh, yes we do need to make a couple extra helpings. Silly me, six is no longer the norm.”

Graduation times two for a 5th grader turned middle school, and an 8th grader turned high school. No problem, they’re still locked into public education. No one’s leaving the house. No need to shed tears…they’re locked in my site and in their rooms for a good four plus years. (The guy who turned senior will remain in denial).

Vacation. Or as I like to call it, a different place to hear some different crap. Don’t get me wrong, I love traveling 9 hours non-stop behind a steering wheel, only to get out and hear, “Do we have to go to the beach?”         Really?   “Nah, we can just sit around for 7 days and let what little rays entering the windows warm us with delight.” What kid doesn’t like to go to the beach? I used to live on it when I was younger. Then again, I didn’t travel with Nintendos, Xboxes, phones, and smart tablets. Nope, it was just me and my walkman. Which tickles my children to no end to look at my old one. It’s as though I’ve just pulled out a telegraph machine and will perform the morris code as I load a disc.

 

Then there’s the social life of everyone in the house but me. “Sure, you need to be at 3 parties in one week? Not a problem. I can get off early, stay up late, and drive those extra 30 miles completely off track of our home. My pleasure.” Now I see why I got off so easy with no one ever joining sports. Just as I was laughing at other moms, running here and there for practices and games, I’m getting it ten fold in one week with ‘hanging out’ here and there.

Last rant, but certainly not least. My job, which I thought would become more streamline with the use of technology, has actually become more challenging. I’m not speaking of the writing gig I do for complete pleasure…the other one. The one I’m bound to do in exchange for monetary support to engage in purchasing gas to haul said popular children around. Yep, the first couple weeks of getting everything that was beautifully stored in a filing cabinet and onto a network, I managed to get an enlarged lymph node. Right on my neck. Not so fun. Then there’s the shoulder aches. Pretty sure it isn’t coming from swinging a golf club. Completely stress. I can’t wait till things on the network become easier!

And so that’s all to tell at the moment. Next post I’m including pictures–real pictures. Of the outside of my house. I’ve been piddling outside quite a bit. Attending a few Trees Anonymous sessions due to all the trees that seem to be jumping inside my car and traveling home with me. It’s a disease. I’m sure of it. I’m even growing smaller ones inside. Help me now!  

Till next time, have a lovely day. Or night. Depending on when you peruse the internet. Have a great one!

 

 

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Reason to Celebrate!!

My sixth book releases today! Who knew? I actually had six of them stored up in this head of mine. Actually a few more, but six spilled out to an editor, where she worked her magic, then it got translated into a picture by another professional, formatted, bound, and viola…there you have book 6, “Searching For Sarah”. I’m quite excited. And a bit nervous…as usual. Good thing I’ve got a tough skin. No telling what the kind people of the world is going to think of it…and then there’s the not-so-kind. And I suppose they have a say, too. (I’ll just discreetly, and with all my might, try to put their opinions out of mind) 🙂

So, what about Sarah? She’s a pretty girl, right? Then why is she a dud magnet for men? I mean really…the last guy she dated stole her U-Haul filled with all her stuff. Right there on the street in Charleston. While she went into that cute coffee shop after driving 8 hours straight, to go to the bathroom. That’s the first push into the path that takes her to this guy:

Sam. So what about Sam? He’s cute, right? He just works a little too much. Therefore, unable to do the all the things a single dad has to do–pick up daughter from preschool, cook a well-balanced meal, (not spaghetti o’, scrambled eggs, and a cup of milk, because that’s all he knows how to cook), and attend an occasional tea party with a few stuffed friends…Mind you, he does get home to read the goodnight book and tuck a sleepy-eyed girl in, but as for the rest, he needs some help. And since Sarah is seeking some temporary housing until an apartment comes through, why not get her to do some of the nanny stuff? Win-win for both of them!

Then the story begins to unfold.So, maybe not that intriguing! But I had one reviewer to say she stayed up till after midnight to finish it. That’s good, huh? Well, I sort of smiled when I read it. 🙂

Either way…it’s my genuine hope…wish…desire…beg (LOL) that readers take a chance to get to know Sarah and Sam. Reminder: this is a 3 part book. At the end, there will be sort of the thing that happens on Friday soap operas…Monday will be the second book–where Friday’s shock gets settled after a weekend wait. Don’t throw tomatoes when you get there. But I promise, Monday is coming very quickly. I’m saving that hype until the release of Friday’s book installment–Searching For Sarah, part 1! Please spread the word, my dearest followers. Cake for everyone!!!! Celebrate. 🙂

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Oh Boy!

yikesA couple of things to report…So here in Virginia, well in my part of Virginia, we got about 5 inches of snow. Maybe more, I don’t exactly keep a gauge outside or check the weather, I’m only guessing based on how much is sitting on top of the bird feeders. Anyway, it was enough that kept me inside. I went to the grocery store last night after going to the movies. We saw ‘Sing’. You know, the one with the dancing pig? It was decent. I only wish the lady next to me hadn’t eaten onions and believed in freely belching in my direction. It was pretty disgusting. The movie made me laugh a few times. And who knew Scarlett Johansson could sing?

But that was the end of my evening. It began in the salon chair, 12 hours earlier than that. I got a haircut about 3 weeks ago and the style wasn’t exactly working for me. I cursed and cringed everyday, but avoided calling and expressing my heartburn over the hairdo. As if telling them might make a worse cut out of the situation. Like sending a burger back to the kitchen and having someone spit in it, or something. So…I wish I’d trusted my gut. I called, and they were too happy to “fix” it. Mind you, I love my stylist. She’s the best, but after I had heart palpitations seeing all my hair end up on the ground, I’m rethinking how much I love her. I. have. no. hair. No, really. None. Okay, so a little. Have you ever seen ‘Steel Magnolias’ when Julia Roberts gets all her hair cut off because she’s sick? Yeah, that about sums it up. I wanted to cry…pull my coat over my head…wear a disguise to work. My four boys are now sporting longer hair than me. Yikes. So I have a wig, hair growth vitamins, and a box or two of tissues to get me through the few weeks to grow an inch. 😦

Subject change…The snow has delayed my son returning to college. Not that I mind! 🙂 It’s been so nice having him home. So what if the laundry heap is higher, and the amount of food to make grows larger…I’ll take it!

Yet another subject…(it’s the short hair, I can’t even think long-term anymore!) Now I’ve got to get back to writing my next book! “Searching for Sarah” is coming along. My heroine is inspired by Jennifer Garner. What a sweet girl. She got the raw end of the deal with Ben, I feel. Really? You need a nanny when you have that sweet, pretty girl that’s your wife? I’ll make sure to give her a stand-up guy in my story! How does Kevin Costner sound?kevin_costner

jennifer-garner

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So Long, August

september-1August was definitely a challenging month for me. I had exactly two weeks before all the chaos began to take place. And who can rest when all they hear is the constant ticking of the clock…tick, tock…tick, tock.

I had to spend the first part of the month preparing for back to school for everyone, including the preparation of sending my first born off to fend for himself in the throws of college. At a place he’s unaccustomed to, without anyone he knows. It was horrific. Perhaps more for me than him. Yes, I got upset. Who doesn’t? For eighteen years I did everything for that boy. And now I’m lucky if I get a phone call from him every couple of days. Which I’m not complaining. Okay, so I am…but I’m happy he’s not homesick and burning the wires telling me he’s got nothing to do. In fact, he’s more busy with four classes than he was with six at home. He’s become very social. And so I’m most happy for him.

Then came the new classes for everyone else in the family. And new teachers. It’s been quite a learning curve to know who will tolerate what and who won’t let you use the bathroom. Can you believe my 10 year old isn’t allowed to use the bathroom in the afternoon? Hello? By then, all the juices and water fountain trips are beginning to settle in the bladder. So I have to endure the car ride home with him doing a jig in the backseat. I simply advised him, upon being told he can’t use the bathroom, to ask if they still keep an emergency set of pants on hand…and do it in his chair. Is this obnoxious? Un-called for? Probably, but come on. Let the boy go take care of business, for goodness sakes.

So the schedules are now in place and September is upon us. I’m getting in the groove of how it’s going to be for the ending months of the year. And September is the month of the release for “Finding Amy.” I’m so excited about this! I’ve had a couple people read it and gotten really good comments. Squee!! And I’m putting it out there for free, for a limited time…just to get everyone primed for the third release. So please feel free to take advantage of this! And of course, let me know what you think. I love to read reviews. …well, some of them. 🙂

With that said, welcome, September! I’m happy to see you back around.

https://www.instafreebie.com/free/rVURO

 

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As Fate Would Have It

KEVINLast week I had it all planned out–new book, new characters, and new city. That was last week. And although I rolled that plot around in my head for days, perfecting it, finding the holes, and sewing up others…it got thrown to the back burner! As in, slammed to the back burner. I woke up Friday to an entirely different story. A meatier one. I think I’m going to be two authors. One who writes romantic, light-hearted pieces and another one who writes deeper ones. A little less on the funny side, heavy on the introspect.

So, this one rolling around in my daydreams stars none other than Kevin Costner. Don’t you just love this guy? I think I fell in love with him in “The Bodyguard”, or was it “For Love of the Game”? Take your pick. He’s a total classic.

And then we have Jennifer Garner. She’s such a good girl–wholesome, nurturing, wants to see the best in people. This will be my heroine. Isn’t she pretty? Another classic. Well not really that old to be a classic yet, but give her another ten years.

Jennifer Garner wallpaper (66)I’ve got so much to do on this story, furthermore, so much to do in my real life. Although I am tickled pink to have such a rich story awaiting the pages of my processor, I only have a week to prepare for all the back to school madness. Everyone has received their schedules, most of the supplies have been purchased, and I’m preparing myself for the departure of college boy. Perhaps this sidetrack of a new story came at the perfect time, after all!

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The Speed of Summer

budI’m squeezing the last few moments out of July. It seems that seeing the month on the calendar calms my jangly nerves. As though when the title of August appears, along with its picture of a new summer scene, my nerves will be electrifying once more.

August–the month everything changes. My first born goes to college, the others return to school, and routines of packing lunches and beating the buses comes back around. I don’t like August. I wish July would stay. I wish the long days, the noisy nights of frogs croaking, and not having to wake up to an alarm clock would never go away.

On another note…I did enjoy some family time this week. You know, before July goes away. We all went to the movies. This is a rarity, sort of. I’m always the one to stay home. Seeing that I’m not the least bit into super hero sightings, I find myself usually in the quiet hours on my sofa…watching something romantic. Not this time! I went along. We went to see the new Star Trek movie. It was typical. A lot of aliens, a lot of blasting, and more than ever…I didn’t understand a lot that was happening. For instance, how crashed ships could get started and fly again. Especially after the enemy set fire to it. Or how the captain girl suddenly disappeared from her captors. And reappeared with the good guys. But science fiction seems to have that under control. Anything can happen and with very little reality attached. Overall, it was an enjoyable movie. I watched the original series, so I marveled how the new characters reminded me of the oldies but goodies.

I finished my third Amy book in July. That was a miracle, indeed. I am awaiting the edits and then off it goes to print! Exciting really. Although, like August coming within a few days and putting an end to all that’s calm…the final word on the page ended the Amy series. I will miss her, but I’m satisfied with the outcome. I hope my readers will agree.

This morning, as I lay in bed, another story busted in on my thoughts. As in, tore down the door…yelled with beating hands on chest, and identified itself as the next one to be written. I was ecstatic and exhausted at the same time. It’s only been four days since I finished Amy. I’m recuperating from all the bleeding of words that one caused me. Another one? So soon? I choose to look at it as fortune and nothing else. Now I need to get started. I’ve already got my characters picked out. I’m saving them for a new post. I hope you can join me then. 🙂