How do you not be sensitive?

criticism-cartoon-1We were talking about being sensitive the other night at home. (My daughter got her feelings hurt by her brothers and has not spoken to them in three days). Growing up, I was told that I was too sensitive. False, by the way, but okay, I get it…there’s such a thing as being too sensitive. Certainly you can’t eradicate it from your life, though. I don’t care who you are, you are going to be a little bit sensitive. It’s human nature. My “boyfriend” said that when people say not to be so sensitive, they really mean that they’re going to criticize you and you better take it well! I guess I get that, too.

It’s a fine line from not getting mired down by the comments people make, and taking it on the chin. Although I was raised to be somewhat of a robot, I feel sensitivity at times gurgling in the pit of my stomach. Someone says something a little off, and I get quiet for some odd reason. I might not even meditate on the feeling it’s bringing me, it just invades me, burrows in my psyche, and moments later I don’t know why I’m sad.

Words are weapons; they can hurt, kill, and destroy. And by that, I mean they can take someone down without you even suspecting it could. “You are what you think.” Ever heard that saying? Ever crave a piece of salted caramel chocolate so bad, that all you do is think about it? Imagine the feeling you’ll get when you bite into it? The joy and happiness it will bring? And then it overcomes you until you get in your car at ten o’clock at night and drive to the nearest Walgreens and raid the aisle like you’re wearing a pair of nylon hose on your head and you’ll hurt anyone who stands in your way with coupons at the checkout? Yeah, me neither. 🙂 Same goes for hearing and believing good in yourself. You hear it and you believe it. The opposite, unfortunately is true.

I always try to build someone up and NEVER ever tear them down. But it happens. Accidents happen. Especially me, now that I read reviews of my books. The positive ones can make me skip for hours, but the negative ones can sit on my shoulders and bear down so hard that I wonder if what I write is utter junk. I think I better put on some of that robotic armor I used to wear when I was younger. That is, if I want to continue this writing gig! As for my daughter, I’ll encourage her to brush off the negativity and maybe go along for one of those Walgreen runs. 🙂


Feeling Sorry for the Underdog

tumblr_l9yc75zSID1qc2cblo1_500As I watched the presidential “thing” in Iowa last night, it was sad to hear the news of some of the candidates dropping out. Of course they would be silly not to with numbers in the single digits, but still….

Isn’t it sad to see someone lose? You consider all the hopes that went into whatever they were trying to achieve, only to be staring down the barrel of rejection. It’s impossible not to take it personal, if you’re in that position, but it’s the way of the world. Regardless of who I want to win, someone has to lose and it’s just sad.

When I’m watching a football game (trust me, it doesn’t happen often), I feel bad for the losers. They had just as much hope as the winners, and now they have to go home having lost.

When a new store opens and fails, I drive by with a frown, shaking my head. Not that I ever needed dried herbs or monkey beads, (that’s why I personally never paid patronage), but it’s someone’s hopes and dreams dashed.

I was raised with the philosophy that emotions were a sign of weakness. That’s probably why, for the most of my life, I was emotionless. Whatever. I didn’t care. I grew a callus over my true thoughts and went on about life. And I guess it shields you from disappointment, but doesn’t that chip away at humanity? If no one cared, what would be the gain?

So, for those that lost last night, I feel for your loss. A hope circled the drain and finally disappeared. For all the failed businesses, at least you tried. Not many can say they did even that.

With my debut book releasing this month, I sure hope I can take the bad reviews. Because let’s face it, they will happen. Books are so subjective. Someone isn’t going to like that I hooked someone up with that guy, or why did I write this way or that? But at least I finished the book and put it out there to take whatever comes. At least I’m that brave! (Wish me luck 🙂

Is it really this month that the book releases? Oh. My. Gosh. Am I really sure about this?