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Have You Ever…

…woke up grumpy for no reason? It’s like trying to step out of quick sand to shake it off. I mean seriously…really? A brand new morning, and this? And I must add that I had pretty decent entertainment last night in my sleep. I have no idea where my dream came from. Who implants these things? To have a full blown plot…extravagant dialogue, and thought out imagery? Who? Last night I was training for Chick-fil-A. I was with a pack of other new employees and we had to wear yellow raincoats and perform show tunes for drive-thru customers. Are you kidding me?

I couldn’t make this stuff up if I had to. I remember forgetting my lines. It was horrible. And the rain…it was pouring. Some dream weaver, interpreter would love to get into my head! I would love to get into my head! LOL

I am going on a birthday getaway this weekend. My sister is hosting a hotel stay and play in Pennsylvania. I’m looking forward to it. I’ve been asked minute by minute by my children the precise time we’re leaving, and what time we’ll arrive, what will we do, when will we get back…..it’s daunting to say the least. I’m going to pre-record a message and let them play it back at will.

Anyway, about the whole getting older thing. I’ve noticed some changes. Subtle…but alas still creeping up on me in the mirror. My neck appears to seem a bit more detailed. Where there was once a regular neck, there are now definitions of other things going on. Can’t really explain in words, but it seems different. I’ve decided to stop looking at it. Then there’s my cheeks. They look swollen. Do I have a gum disease lurking? Or is this how it’s going down? Plump cheeks. I guess they could be drawn and empty. Okay, I’ll take plump. Still need to see the dentist though. ūüôā

I’m okay with getting older. I get to use it to my advantage a lot of the times. You know, “I know because I’m ancient like trees. I’ve been there, done that” sort of thing. Learn from your elders! Yuk. That’s become me, hasn’t it? *sigh*

Last point of the day. My bed. When does it become that there’s too many things on the bed? I love extra pillows. They prop me up at night to watch television. Then my husband bought me this Peppa Pig lamb for Christmas that makes noises. I love it. So I kept it on my bed, where my children know not to squeeze it. It could stop and I don’t see where to replace batteries. But then my mom just got me a new bunny for Easter. Yes, my mother still loves me! And it looks good on there, too. Oh, and there’s that new pillow that happened to be a complete steal at Target. I bought the comforter to go with it for my new daughter’s room but it didn’t match. I kept the pillow instead. But is it too much? It’s beginning to be an ordeal to make up my bed in the mornings and account for all this junk!

It doesn’t look like it, but there are 7 pillows there! No, 8. One of them is hiding. Shewee…I must put a stop to the collection. Who can just go to sleep anymore without cataloging this stuff? If I don’t watch it, I might come home and find my husband doing a little of this!

But seriously….have a great week and weekend. I’ll make sure and take a lot of pictures of Amish country to share with everyone! Peace out!!

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Having Conflict

CONFLICTI’ve regrettably been experiencing conflict lately. I mean, who likes conflict anyway? Who seeks it out and rolls around in it, loving all the things that go with it? The strife, the nasty words, the hidden meanings behind kinder words? I suppose I know some people who do. Doesn’t everyone?¬†I ‘m not one of them.

But, if you think about it…what book or movie sells without having conflict? Conflict drives everything. Who wants to read about someone’s happy life? Page after page of hum-drum happiness. Yes, it’s great to be happy, but how do you know you’re experiencing happiness if you’ve never sat through a storm of discontentment? Do we know what hard is, if all we experience is soft?

So yes, although I very much hate going through this particular conflict, I must say, I will advance to greater things because of it. I never write a book with the intention that the conflict is going to kill off the characters. I write the conflict to sharpen them—make them see that now, because of it, they are happier.

Going through it, though, I feel choked, burdened, and undecided. My world, (not its entirety certainly), has become shaken a bit. Like¬†a snow globe. One day I’m settled on where all the flakes have settled, and now they’ve been turned up, floating in the air, and I can’t seem to find peace until they’ve found a spot to land. Will they all land in the right spots?

On a brighter note, I dreamed of three white owls last night. I know, right? Really…the dream thing again? But I kid you not, these things happen to me. Who, out of nowhere, dreams of three white owls? Usually I’m dreaming of other weird stuff, but the kind of weird that I can see happened because¬†of what¬†happened the day before. i.e. I¬†eat spaghetti at 11:00 pm and dream¬†I’m at a party all night with noodles in my hair!¬†That sort of thing.¬†¬†¬†¬† So anyway,—I look up owls and it says that change is going to come and it’s a sign of wisdom. Yay for me! I failed to mention though, that one of the white owls died. It got spooked by my dog and died instantly. Total freak out moment for me!! I’m ignoring that clever part of the dream. Perhaps I have two more chances to get it right. ?

My truest advance apologies if this post comes across convoluted. I’m in the midst of watching my snowflakes land. And most hopeful that all the decisions I make in the following weeks will bring about the perfect spots for each and every one of them!

Cheers!

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Dream Interpretation

Black-bearDoes anyone believe that dreams have meanings? To a certain extent I believe dreams are an extension of your subconscious. Things that you are scared to do in real life or things on your mind during the daylight hours, tend to pop up in unusual dreams. I don’t, therefore, look for symbolism in a dream in which I’m going to a party and having a good time. I embrace the getaway and wake up refreshed the next day. However, when I dream of something you’d find being described in a conversation with a psychiatrist, I take note.

Last spring I dreamed of a white bull. It was at the end of a street. I was a block away from it and could feel my insides quake when I saw air blow from its nostrils. I knew I couldn’t outrun it, and usually I’m the type that collapses in fear rather than run, but I took off. The more I felt the muscles in my legs burn, the less I heard its hooves on the pavement behind me. I turned to see it not chasing me. Then I woke up. Turns out white bulls are a sign of wealth! Perhaps I wish it had chased me:) Ironically speaking, we are now getting a white bull. Coincidence?

So last night, I dreamed someone gave me a black bear to carry on my back. At first I didn’t think I was able to carry it, but as soon as I hoisted it up around my shoulders, it was actually comfortable. Warm, even. I carried this little electric blanket, breathing, terror everywhere I went. I walked these weird¬†paths with two other faceless people, searching for someone. I didn’t really know who. My sister? Anyway, when I went into places I became nervous, almost freaking out that people would see this bear and they wouldn’t understand. They’d think I was strange, try to take it away, or hurt it in some way. On the contrary, when I confronted my first situation with strangers no one saw it. No one flinched, looked over my shoulder, or waivered from staring¬† me in the eyes. Didn’t they see it?

The longer the time I had with it the more it’d become my security … my baby. Yes! I even felt it was like my baby. Something I had to guard and protect. Weird, huh? It never occurred to me to wonder why it couldn’t walk itself. Or where was I taking it to?

I looked it up when I awoke this morning and the consistent meaning I found was it represented fear. I suppose that would make sense why no one could see it. Now I guess I need to wonder about what I’m fearing. Why couldn’t I have dreamed of being a racecar driver or something fun? These deep thoughts are too much for a Sunday morning!