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Nice Guys…

It is true…they finish last, but they usually last longer than any other species! How many of you married a nice guy? If you did, then you’re probably still married to him. Jerks are typically divorced, possibly turned nice because they knew there was no other way, and maybe they’re re-married, or they are eating tv dinners alone with their dog who is licking the empty plastic container because, well they have a jerk for an owner. Now, how many of you dated the jerk before moving on to the nice guy? Yep, everyone, right? Well, a lot of you for sure. My apologies to the ones who married said jerks, thinking they would change them. I know I was one of those that dated the jerk. I had to. It’s the thing to do. That jerk is so tempting, so alluring, so needful to capture. Like a rare butterfly whose wings turn into cheap plastic decoys once they think they’ve got you.

I remember my jerk. He was a humongous flirt, dangerously cute, sweet talker, and a challenge. Nice guys are NO challenge. Their humility and kindness oozes from them like foam from a shaken coke can. They can’t hide it. It’s who they are–how they were raised. Or not. It’s just who they are. You can take your car and run over a nice guy. Apologize and all is forgiven. The jerk will drop you like a hot potato, no hesitation involved. And they will probably get in their car and leave a few tracks on your back, just for ‘Even Stevens’. Anyway, I digress. That jerk is cunning. You think he’s a mountain to climb, to place your flag, and let every girl know you’re out with Joe Cool. Shortly, after you’re sick to death of him checking himself out in the silverware at your table, you’re ready to move on. And that’s when Nice Guy comes into the picture. I have a few of those in my family. Of course, I do. ūüôā Their dad is nice, and I don’t raise jerks. ūüėČ And so I tell them, don’t worry boys, when the girls are tired of the jerks, suddenly you will come into focus for them. You will look like that hero on the white horse. The one that opens her car door, asks what she wants to do, where she wants to eat. Sadly, you will finish last. But it will be you that finished. Not the jerk.¬†

I’ve noticed all the trendy things going around now are ‘Be Kind’ geared. Really? We have to post this on social media? Be kind. What is this world coming to that this has to be a ‘thing’…a revival, a happening? There is honestly a movement where I live for this very sentiment. People painting it on rocks, features on the front page of the newspaper about people going around with signs… I guess this philosophy goes hand in hand with the jerk thing. Why are there jerks? Why does someone choose not to be nice and kind and giving and compassionate? Is the other way so much easier? I think it’s because kindness was never offered to them. Although this is a learned behavior, why should they? Obviously girls like it. For a short time. You date a jerk…if you’re lucky, you marry the nice guy.

And that’s just my little dessert plate of what the jerk and nice guy’s position in life are. Please feel free to comment if you feel differently! I love to hear from you. ūüôā

Don’t forget, my new release comes out next week!!!! I’m too excited. No, really I am.

¬†Pre-order here!¬†Oh, and of course, there is a jerk in the book. He has the tiniest of all parts. ūüôā Hey, it had to be true to life, didn’t it? Thank you kindly.

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If I look hard enough….

4014171-yellow-small-sticky-note-on-an-office-cork-bulletin-board-weekend-happiness-stock-photo…I can see the weekend approaching. I don’t know about anyone else, but this week dragged on and on. Not that I don’t appreciate time and all that stuff, but it really lagged. It all started with last weekend when I was sick. I caught someone’s cold. I couldn’t properly breathe from Saturday until Tuesday evening. I took everything on the market to combat it. Vitamin C in boat loads, Zinc in quantities to feed small villages, Flonase up the wazoo, vitamin B, Mucinex, and Advil in massive amounts. Did it help? Sure. I’m on day six and I feel bunches better. I can now sleep without sitting straight up, and I can keep my mouth closed and let my nose do the job of exchanging oxygen to the lungs. Yay!

So I suppose that’s why the week was long. I suffered through it. And I wasn’t entirely all that busy at work. I was doing down-time things. Like look-at-the-clock things. Making sure the second hand wasn’t stuck or broken. And don’t even ask about dinners. It was a chore to think up something every night. I mean how many things can I possibly cook and make it seem new? Tacos…again, breakfast for dinner, some type of chicken….again, some type of beef…again.

i-hate-it-when-im-waiting-for-mom-to-cook-6293624So tomorrow is Friday!!! Yay. A do-over for the weekend I missed due to hacking, blowing, and sneezing. Jipped out of two days, and now it’s come back around. I can’t wait. I’m spending my Friday changing the oil in my car. I hope it’s an easy wait. Last time I was there I was asked out on a date. Me, can you believe it? I haven’t been asked out for…let me see…22 years? Nah, it couldn’t be that long. No wonder the guy looked at me like I was trying to guess the correct answer for the final Jeopardy round, after he asked me. I just didn’t know what to say. He was asking me out? Did I hear him right? I stammered and finally blurted out that I was busy. Hmm…that didn’t sound right. Busy doing what? Was I serious? Busy being married I quickly added. What a jerk I felt like. Busy being married? I guess my go-to answer in my single days was being busy, but when that didn’t jive with today’s current situation I added something. I apologized to him and let it go as he got called for his car. He shrugged and told me I had a lucky husband. What a nice guy. I’m just hoping he’s not due for an oil change tomorrow. I still feel as if I need to cover up with some dark glasses should our paths ever meet. Busy being married?? Oy.

No other plans scheduled for the following days. Actually I’m going to stop at some sales on the way home and try my best to remove the pumpkins that still loiter at my house. Enough is enough. Aren’t the stores stocking Valentines by now? No, really I’m going to begin decorating with a few wintery things. Not too many. I don’t want to freak out my children. I usually decorate for Christmas during Thanksgiving break. Nevermind that the temperature here tomorrow is going to be 70 degrees. HO-Ho-HO!

Anything else I do is a bonus. I’m trying to concentrate on writing my new book, which I’m avoiding hopelessly with everything else in the world to do. The word document scares me for some reason. It makes me feel I have to focus and that’s the last thing on my mind!! Anyway, have a great weekend my fellow readers! ūüôā

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Just What the World Needs…

tech…a new way to converse with one another.

I looked at my children the other night, standing around in the kitchen–each one of them had their heads hung, looking at a device. For my smallest, it was a 3DS; my daughter, her IPOD; my two boys, phones. Even my¬†husband was swinging¬†his neck to look at his phone screen. I exclaimed how they all looked–ridiculous. Granted, I do it too…but it’s crazy. It’s too much. Do you know my two youngest boys have withdrawal if they don’t have a device in their hands all the time? And can you imagine the number it’s doing on your vertebrae?

So I¬†was talking to my fourth son in birth order. He was telling on his sister¬†about¬†typing something on Snapchat. Snapchat? What? What is this and how does she have an account? I’m not an old fogey, but I do like to have a¬†say on what social media she’s on. There are too many predators out there to think it’s all innocent–which is what young girls believe it is, and should be. Anyway, he continues to say that Snapchat is an outlet in which once the person views the message, it vanishes. Hmm….okay. So let’s¬†recap; Instagram is for pictures– Facebook is to proclaim what type of mood you’re in or kind of day you’re having, or what you’re eating–Pinterest is for pinning special photos to boards you want to keep–Twitter is to advertise (let’s face it, no one does much more than this)–and now Snapchat is to correspond¬†with people and then have it disappear. Kind of like a secret message that self-destructs. Interesting. How many others ways can they dream up to¬†communicate with¬†one another that doesn’t involve physical human interaction? Hearing someone’s voice is almost obsolete anymore.

I suppose speed is the new thing. And the internet, of course is the highway for it all. After all, it’s how I’m communicating now. But why can’t you just not tell the world every single detail of your life? Every second of the day? Why can’t you hold it all in, for say a week, and then give¬†a person a call and have a good talk on the phone. Like we used to.¬†I feel the world is getting to be a bit too much in your business.¬†Don’t¬†get me¬†wrong, I stalk Facebook to see what everyone is doing. Doesn’t mean it isn’t a sad pastime. It’s sort of funny because if I see¬†Facebook people out on the street, I feel like¬†it’s¬†a weird¬†celebrity sighting. As if you’re following their life through the media and now they’re there in the flesh. Like ‘hey, I saw you the other night at that¬†restaurant eating spaghetti. I was happy to read the doctor’s visit checked out great!’.¬†But it’s not always a good thing. You see their status and you feel like you’ve checked in with them. You don’t need to give¬†them a call to connect personally…you know¬†what they’re up to already. You’ve checked the ‘like’ button and all is up to date.

They say Snapchat is going to trump the other social media icons by having 150 million users. 150 million!!! People want speed and direct ability to chat with a single person, then have it go away.¬†Hey, here’s a notion…wait until something earth-shattering happens to you, then call them! I would be shocked to know how many relationships rely more on¬†technology than person-to-person. It makes me happy I dated in the phone age.¬†Where I heard the voice of the other person, and gushed on the one side of the telephone connection–staying up all night, talking about everything. And I didn’t have to guess their tone. Have you ever read a message from someone and wondered what the whole capitalization was for? Let’s face it, capital letters show tone. Was it an accident they typed ‘VERY tired’? Does that mean they don’t want to text now? And why didn’t he/she comment on that last text? Did they not get it? When in fact, they didn’t, but you assume they didn’t like your comment and now it was up to you to backtrack. Yep, I’m grateful I had use of the phone during my dating years. Well, kind of. I remember a few times it would’ve been nice to send a¬†Snapchat for an easy break-up! ūüôā

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Lost to a Generation

inside-blockbusterIs it just me, or did someone else out there remember doing this on the weekend? Going to the video store was as necessary as sleeping in on Saturday morning. And if you didn’t get there early enough, the selection for the new releases was picked dry. Don’t get me started on the late fee anxiety. By the time I took the thing back, the late fees could’ve bought it. But wasn’t it fun? Standing around, reading the backs of empty boxes, and picking out the popcorn in the buckets that popped up pretty in its own container. The video store is where I actually met my¬†husband for our first real date. We were going to pick out a movie together and then take it to my house to watch. That way my mother could meet him, watch him for 2 hours, and size him up for not being a killer. He was actually¬†20 minutes late and I almost left.

Sadly I remember video stores when they carried VHS or Beta tapes. And if you brought it back without rewinding it, they charged an extra 25-50 cents!

More sadly is that my children will not have this ritual available to them. Instead, they watch as I get out of the car and wait¬†to use¬†the Red box. How impersonal. And annoying! Have you ever stood behind someone in 20 degree weather while they read the description to every movie on the screen? Yeah, okay…sometimes I’m that person. But who can help it. I need to know what they’re about. I certainly don’t make a habit of it, but how annoying the entire thing is. Someone standing behind me huffing somehow makes me rush. Not that this trick helps in all situations. Some people certainly don’t care when I huff behind them! And you’re lucky if you find a Red box. Give me a Blockbuster any day. Of course living out in the boonies, Netflix is not an option for me. If only. But still, I think if given the choice of dialing one up on my television or going to the video store, I might….take the television. But I still long for the store. Someone please tell me a Kindle will never take the bookstores away. I looove my Kindle, but I love the smell of books more. ūüôā

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77%

Couple_bored_2475394kI was listening to the radio the other day at work, and they were talking about a poll done on couples. They said that 77% of women think a guy knows exactly what’s wrong when they’re quiet and say that nothing’s wrong. Or something to that effect. I laughed out loud at the guy announcer. He was shocked. Really? I’m certainly one of those 77. I believe that when I’m quiet, my boyfriend knows very well what’s wrong. He’d have to. I’m not a mystery. He knows me well enough. There’s context clues out there in the big, bad world. Or, do they just want to feign like they don’t know, just to get out of talking about it? That’s fine with me; I don’t want to talk about it either…but know I’m not happy…and you know why!

Then I¬†told this poll’s results to another guy. You know, that I know¬†full well that my guy knows what my problem is when I’m quiet. And HE was shocked! Are you serious? Are guys really that unaware? Don’t you think that after you say you’re going out on Saturday with the guys and I get quiet, there’s a correlation? Seriously?

On a separate, but related subject…

I thought it was funny… my daughter got into the car today after school and said two of her friends returned from being suspended. Oh my gosh! “What were they suspended for?” I asked. She said one choked a guy and the other unrelated event, was another girl hitting a guy for saying something about her friend (his ex-girlfriend). I know, I know. I have 4 boys; I’d be pretty ticked if a girl choked or hit my son, but being a girl made me chuckle. Those girls were trying to get through to those guys. Wrong way to do it, of course. But, I don’t think that generation sounds too much like the quiet type. Those guys should have no problem with percentages of trying to figure out a girl. I don’t think they’ll give them the chance!